Bending the Bow Int'l

Today was quite a day. We are feeling a little wiped out and so exhilerated in the same breath! We are grateful for God's UNFAILING LOVE and GOODNESS in our lives. Before we came on this trip the Lord spoke to me and he told me that our lives and the lives of our children would be "unscathed"...safe....protected. He knew that I would need that word. This past week I have tightly clung to that word.

Over the past few weeks Josh has been experiencing an increasing level of pain in his back, head, and stomach...NO FEVER. We did everything we knew to do for Josh...including taking him to the doctor and reading everything possible in the medical books I have with me and off of the internet, giving him medicine to treat the symptoms, and praying like crazy for him.
All week we have been crying out to the Lord for Josh. I knew He had to do something for us because that was our only option. I was worried, but I really had a peace that I could trust the Lord, no matter what things might look like.

Today Josh woke up worse than ever. I had already planned to take him back to the doctor AGAIN. Stacy suggested we try another doctor. We did. As the day progressed I realized even more how sick Josh was and how serious this could be. Not knowing the cause was making me crazy with concern. After the doctor examined him he ordered some blood tests. While they were running the tests Josh's back started hurting even more. He asked if we could take a walk to help work the pain out. As we started to walk he started acting funny. His legs got weaker and slightly limp. I literally thought I was going to pass out; I felt the blood drain out of my arms and legs. I felt weak and lightheaded....the stress of the possibilities of what could be going on overwhelmed me. I wrestled with a spirit of fear. Immediately I dragged Josh back into the doctor's office. Everyone was extremely concerned. They took him into a back room and laid him down...he was really tired and it felt like he was fading...he was falling asleep while he was talking. I kept thinking, "I can't let him go to sleep." I was so worried he would fall into a coma.

When the doctor returned he informed us that Josh had tested positive for malaria (even though we are on antimalarial meds...) and he had the most serious form, (p. falciparum).
FINALLY...direction. And only hours after we sent out emails to many of you to pray. God is soooo good to us. I know it may seem odd to be so happy about Josh having malaria, but His peace filled us instantaneously. We had direction and malaria is treatable and extremely common in places like Tanzania, Africa. The doctors are super experienced with malaria. They are experts in malaria. Josh did not have the typical malaria symptoms, but malaria is so common here that they tested him as routine act. If Josh would have had these symptoms at home it could have take much longer to figure it out. I am so grateful we were here and the treatment was quick and effective. The Lord's love completely enveloped us today, reminding us how close He is to us. He took me to a new place with Him today. A new place of trusting Him...a new place of knowing Him.

After his first does of medicine he is already significantly better. This is the first night he has not cried himself to sleep. For the past week we have laid with him and prayed with him and over him. I even woke Stacy and Ryan up the night before last in the middle of the night because I was soooo concerned. Each night we prayed until he fell asleep. It usually took around 2 hours. Then came the morning rarely with any relief. In the day time the awareness of the pain returned and even with the availability of the doctors, the internet, and medicine we had not been able to figure out the root cause of all of his pain...until today. He is still in pain..and sore and tired and pretty weak, but there is significant improvement all around.
I am so grateful to the Lord. I feel like when we sent out that email yesterday to have people pray again He really responded to people crying out for us. I am so grateful....and tired!!! Adrenaline at it's best!!!

So, the plan for Joshua is that I will give him an injection (to treat the malaria) each day for the next few days and I will take him back to the Muslim clinic to be rechecked several times before we leave. When we get home I will have our doctor check him as well.

I feel so washed in HIS unfailing love and goodness, overwhelmed by His tangible presence. He has taken me to a new level of trust in Him through this and I am grateful...and tired. ha!
...and tonight I held each of my babies a little bit longer. I kissed them with a little more tenderness and feeling. Tears of gratitude fall down my cheeks. My husband and children are safe. I have come to the end of myself....to the end of my resources...to the end of all that I know to do...and the end of me is the beginning of Him. My God can't help but care for me, extend himself to me, show Himself strong on MY BEHALF. That is the character of God and my God has covered and protected my family just as He promised me He would...and in doing so has reminded me of His unfailing love and of His goodness...of His faithfulness.

...so then, as I head off to bed I can't help but think about those who don't carry the same hope that I have inside of me...those who don't even know that there is a God that cares so deeply for them...those whose children WILL die of malaria today, tomorrow, this week. For these I cry out to the Lord: "Show yourself strong on their behalf, Lord. Reveal yourself to these. They do not love their sons or daughters any less than Seth and I. Grace...Strength...Healing...Hope...Let them encounter You as You have let me encounter You. Your presence changes us, Jesus. You are so good and Your love NEVER fails."